Reading Fiona Scott Norman's article in the doctor's waiting room about bucket lists last Friday made me laugh. She said her bucket list was going to be to write bucket list. I thought I'll go her one better by not even writing anything for my bucket list. Don't write in I realise the paradox of this statement. But she got me thinkin I hate that shit. "You really have to go to the French Riviera." Like it's gonna change my life. Uluru - that looks like a nice rock but fuck It'll be hot and it is just a rock
 |
| Great big very far away hot rock |
Fiji's heat is just bearable because I'm only ever 1 minute away from a swimming pool or the sea. Don't get me started on extreme sports. But they're gnarly dude! What about a quick game of Tiddlywinks instead.
 |
Hey kids you too could get this guy
down to his undies in a game of strip
Tiddlywinks! (me suspects he plays
to lose) |
A game of homemade indoor golf where you have to get the ball into a cup after a spontaneously arranged obstacle course. There's no limit to the amount of holes, it could be just a two hole game or 73 holes. Afterwards you don't have to drink in a bar with a bunch of people who probably think they're better than you. You can can have a slab and or bottle scotch with your fellow players to the tunes of your choice. Jumping out of a plane - big whoop! How many people go to places that might be tourist attractions that are really interested in them or are just going because it has become an attraction for tourists.
Don't get me started on tattoos what is goin on there? I never really had an issue with tatts until I watched a series of
LA Ink. It's not about being cool or tough apparently. It's about having a really tedious story in the most earnest sense about something deep and oh so meaningful that's happened in your life and you are going mark this event with a tattoo. Then later when someone asks about your tatt you'll once again get to regale your fucking story as earnestly as possible. My God these people were taking themselves so seriously it was fucking demented. It made me never want get a tattoo but it also made me love those people who just got a tattoo for no reason, because they were bored or they were so drunk in Thailand they can't even remember why. I'm torn about not getting a tattoo or getting the most frivolous/meaningless tatt I can imagine (but will that then make a tedious storyteller about why I got such an absurd tattoo, uugghh! the conundrum!).
 |
| Problem solved I'll just go with this! |
